I saw my Richmond Oncologist today, Dr. Sherman Baker. I like him a lot. I was hoping to get a more specific answer to the question, when is this thing going to happen? The fact is, they don’t know. Days? Weeks? A couple of months? Don’t know. And no tests can tell me anything particularly specific about that. So we pretty much decided not to do any more scans or tests unless something changes. I feel good about that decision.
The prognosis? Sometime in the next month, more or less, I should start going rather gently into that good night. The usual course is that I’ll continue to get weaker and more tired. I’ll lose my apetite even more than I already have. (I’ve lost seventy pounds since my high point last year.) Breathing difficulties will be handled by morphine, so it shouldn’t be too painful.
Shame this has to end at the very time I’m getting good at this patient thing. Three times a day I explain to complete strangers in nurses’ uniforms exactly how my bowels are doing. I do that with a straight face even when my daughter-in-law’s sitting at the side of the bed. This must be what John Donne meant when he wrote “Death be not proud.” He could have added “Death, be not dignified.”
Mr. Hughes,
I’ve never had the honor of meeting you, or even been to Richmond for that matter. But my mother passed away two weeks ago from pancreatic cancer.
The difference between you and her is everyone I know who knows you has extremely nice things to say. Because you did amazing things with your life along with doing a great deal of good for others. And that you are deeply loved by many because of this.
The creative industry will be losing an icon, but what saddens me most is that the world will be losing you as a person.
Most Sincerely,
Colin Corcoran
Copywriter
The main topic of conversation of my Aunt Claire is her bowels. She speaks of their workings in crowded elevators, at dinner, as the lights dim for the main feature at the movies and every Sunday when I call to say hello. So, if when I see you next, you are asked about the state of your colon…it will not horrify or surprise me. In fact, it’ll feel like home:) I love you. xox
Mike,
I just received this blog from Dot and have been thinking of you and all that you have gone through and my prayers have really been with you and your family. I’ll always remember when my parents would bring us to Richmond to visit with you. It was always my favorite time when you, Bill Murphy and I would hang out together doing things that kids do (going swimming, building model cars, exploring the woods etc.). These are times that I will never forget. I was always proud of you then as I am today to say that you are my cousin Mike. God Bless you Mike and I Love You.
Your Cousin,
Bill Roach
Thinking of you and Ginny. Love, Susie
Hello Mike,
I know I have only met you & your loved ones once, for the Family Reunion, in Richmond with Bill. I am so PROUD to be a part of this family! Everyone is so loving in this family!
I knew when I saw the Obama sticker on your car, that we could all be friends. LOL
You are loved near and far!
Bill has always talked about the love he has for you & Ginny.
What ever the outcome, keep the light on for all of us for the Big Reunion!
We don’t want to get lost. I don’t want to miss it!
Love to all
Janice Spondike, Roach
You’re a good man, Mike. The best. There are million other things else I could say about you but in the end it all comes down that. Stay strong and know we’re all praying for you. God be with you, Cedric
Mr Hughes,
I stumbled upon your story via a person I follow on twitter. It has resonated with me and I’m sure, many of the people who read your story, because my mother was recently diagnosed with ovarian and fallopian tube cancer. I marvel at the way you have approached this battled and I consider myself privileged to be able to follow you. You are a true inspiration and were blessed with a warriors heart. Though we have never met, please know you are in my thoughts and I look forward to each new post.
Best,
Russell Der
Hi Mike – I’ve been reading your blog for a while now and every day it brings a smile, a tear (sometimes more) and very fond recollections of the few times we’ve sat together around a big table at VCU. My mom is fighting the lung cancer fight herself and your words are amazingly helpful. You are in my thoughts every day…. Love, Toni
I can’t tell you how many “comments” I’ve written over the past week, only to find that I wasn’t logged in properly. Maybe it happened for a reason. You probably would have teased me anyway. They were really nice. I just wanted to thank you for including all of us on your journey and in your life. Please keep writing. Not ready to say goodbye.
Love,
Alda
Life is hard to get right. Death seems even harder. There aren’t a whole lot of good role models for either one. Thank you for giving all of us a gift as a true role model. The actions you are taking will ripple outwards for generations.
Thank you.
- Dave Swartz
Mike,
I just wanted to let you know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I never did have the pleasure to sit down and have a conversation with you while I was at TMA, but when we would pass in the halls or see each other in meetings, I was always greeted with a warm smile. I’m so proud to have worked for The Martin Agency and for the man who helped make it what it is today.
God Bless!
Susan Solomon
I am thrilled to see you are under the care of Dr Baker. He was Tom’s Dr too and we both loved him. I a great note taker and did a lot of read each too, dr Baker was very patient with both Tom and me and made is both feel comfortable. He never made us feel that a question was stupid and was very kind to Tom.
Our team was Dr Baker, Dr DiNardo (ENT surgeon) and Dr Song our Radiologist.
I love them all and can’t sing the praises of the Massey Cancer Center enough. And Dr Song would look at my notebook and say, “did you get that? Do you want me to spell that?”
Needless to say they are all the most patient, professional, kind and caring drs that I know.
You are in good hands with Dr Baker. I am pretty sure he will remember Tom and me…believe it or not, he will recall “the hugger!!”
Sleep well tonight, sweet Mike. Now that I know who is taking care of you, I will!
Hugs
Jean
I thought the broccoli diet was a very odd way to lose weight but, frankly, this new one you have may shed pounds but, all things considered, I wish you could have stuck with the broccoli and diet coke.
I miss seeing you and miss our chats about everything from movies to Davos. You are missing some good movies, by the way.
Other than thinking about you, I am good. About to start a new gig in polling research. You’d like it. I get to straddle media and let consumers speak.
Wish we could. Rest easy, all is going to be good.
Mort
Mike, a day doesn’t go by that I’m not grateful for having been introduced to the world of advertising by you, John, Harry and the much smaller Martin crew from so long ago.
I like to tell people that I fell in with a good crowd. It was just dumb luck, it was a gift, and I probably should have done much more with it. But I’ll always have it, and always treasure it.
Now it’s time to thank you again, for sharing such private parts of your life, and doing it with such spirit.
I was so happy to introduce Heidi to Steve Bassett, finally, last spring. I hope she gets to meet you soon as well.
Much love from Spokane!
Mike,
Not a day goes by that I’m not grateful that my introduction to the world of advertising was through you, Harry, John and the much smaller crew of the Martin Agency so many years ago.
For me, it was dumb luck, a gift and a blessing. I probably didn’t do enough with it. But I treasure it always. If I never said “thank you” quite directly enough, well, thank you.
You’re being exactly the Mike Hughes I love and admire with this blog. Thank you for sharing some of your most personal parts of your life.
I was so happy last Spring to introduce my wife (unbelievable, huh?) to Steve Bassett, when we were in Richmond. Sadly, you weren’t in that day. I hope to introduce you Heidi on some beautiful spring day soon.
Much love from Spokane,
Barrett
And Mike, if you’re moderating this thing… please feel free to edit my “copy.” Typos, organization, syntax, anything. I mean… that would be like reallllllly old times!
You never cease to amaze me. Thank you for sharing so much of your time with so many of us. Ginny is lucky to have you and you her. We’re all eternally grateful that she was kind enough to let us borrow you. Love you, Mike.
The freedom to make poopie jokes. A joy usually reserved for 4 year olds. I guess that’s the Circle of Life. Hakuna Mutata, Mike.
Best,
Rich
Hi Mike.
It’s Ty.
You already know how much I love you,
so we’ll let that one go for a minute.
Remember how many times you told me to quit smoking?
Yeah … well…that one is starting to sink in a little.
(and if no one else gets the humor in this, I know you will)
You are a good man, Mike Hughes.
Aaaaand…a minute is up…so I can say it.
I love you.
-ty
I have a request. Could you write your Joy manifesto for us? I wish I memorized it when you read it aloud countless times. I loved it every time.
Mike-
I was saddened yesterday to learn of your news. I’m not surprised ,however, that you have faced it with thoughtful reflection,style,grace and wit.
I’m sure Ginny’s news is more distressful to you than your own.
Clare and i will keep you both in our prayers. As I deal with my own turn with a rare incurable lymphoma I hope i can follow your example in making peace with it all.
with prayers,
Michael Newbrand